32 OF THE MICHAEL ENEYO’S ADVICE TO YOUNG MEN WHO ARE PREPARING FOR MARRIAGE

1. Far all young men aspiring to marry. Before you plan for the marriage, you should plan for your life after the marriage. Don’t keep so much debts in the name of marrying a wife. You should be man enough to ignore some advice that would be coming from friends who are fools; the advice that will put you in debts, just to prove a point that your marriage was superb.
2. Don’t promise her marriage if you are not ready to settle down with her. Never raise the hope of a woman in vain. This is one of the principles of relationships you must not compromise.
3. If you raise her hope and then turn back to frustrated her plan, you will not have it easy in your marriage at all. If she is the kind whose mind is highly corrupt, any opportunity she has, she can kill your wife or ruin your life. A woman’s anger is more dangerous than a bite from a snake.
4. When you see some men having difficulties in life, some of them might have betrayed their girls. I am not saying that all the men’s sufferings are caused by this. But I’m saying that it can contribute to your woes.
5. If you had ever promised her marriage and her character couldn’t allow you to fulfill your promise to her, be bold enough to tell her that you have changed your mind. Tell her that her character is bad. If you’re sincere with your explanation to her, you will free yourself from any curse from her. A curse from a woman who is sincere to you can destabilize your marriage or destroy your home. That’s why you must be careful with it.
6. Don’t begin a relationship with a life that is fake. From the early period of your relationship let her know your “dos” and “don’ts”. You can even hide some of your good characters from her if you wish. But to pretend to be a very nice guy when you’re not will surely bring problems to your family if you decide to settle down with her. Which is why your lifestyle should not be faked by you.
7. I hope you know that you can only fake a life for some period of time. There’s no way you can fake it for life. Any day you want to return to your real life, problems will come. When she notices the change, she will think that another woman has stolen your love for her, without knowing that your love was fake right from the time you met.
8. If she is befriending another man who is richer than you withdraw from her. Don’t join her to loot the man unless you’re not ready to take her for a wife. Because if you marry her and bring her to your house, you will not have any moral justification to rebuke her when she is sleeping around with men. She will remind you that it was what she used in sustaining you when you were in courtship with her. That is why you should not allow your girlfriend to collect money from another man to eat with you.
9. Don’t marry a woman because her parents are rich. I am not saying it is wrong to marry from a family that is well to do. Before you marry her ensure that her character is the one you can endure. A bad character even with wealth is hell. Wealth without a good character can never guarantee peace in the home.
10. There are three material requirements you must check out in a lady you want to choose as a wife:1. Find out if she is going to school or has gotten her degree 2. You must know if she has what she is doing to sustain her life even if she couldn’t go to school. 3. If not; find out if she has the willingness to do any of the two if the opportunity is given to her. If she doesn’t have the first two above and also rejects the third. No matter how beautiful she is disengage from her. You must marry a woman that would be ready to contribute. A successful marriage is when the parties are able to play their roles.
11. Spiritually speaking, you should marry a woman who can pray. When you are toiling your wife should be praying for you. If she gathers the children and prays concerning your requests, their prayers will open doors of success to you. That is why you must marry a woman who can pray.
12. I am not saying that church and mosque are the only places you can meet with saints. But it is better to marry a wife who has a place to worship her God. If you are not comfortable with the church or a mosque, she should worship in a native shrine of her choice. The truth is that in life, someone should have a place s/he belongs. That is why it’s always wrong to “sit on the fence”.
13. No matter how wealthy your parents may be, don’t enjoy staying with them and become a man in their house. Go out and face the challenges of life. That is the only time you can say you’re a man.
14. If you are above 25 years and you are still living in your father’s compound, you should have your apartment separate from theirs. Take the responsibilities of furnishing the apartment and providing food for yourself. If you don’t begin early enough to care for or to manage yourself. When your parents are no longer alive you will not be able to manage their wealth. That’s why the properties of most wealthy people always vanish immediately when they die, because they didn’t bring up children who are able to manage their lives.

15 If you want to marry a lady, you should know her family first. You must try to know her relationship with her parents at home. Many of the girls in the streets are roaming with curses on their heads: curses that were placed on them by their parents because of their stubbornness in the house. If you marry such a lady, you’re marrying a curse.

16. If she likes advising you to distance yourself from your mum be careful with her. She is planning to call your mother a witchcraft in days to come. Sometimes, it may be that she had already damaged her womb. She is looking for somebody she will accuse for her inability to give birth to a child for you.
17. I am not saying every woman must be able to give birth to a child. Some barrenness is by nature and not from man. So it doesn’t mean that every woman that is barren has destroyed her womb. All I’m saying is you should not give any woman an opportunity to insult your mom.
18. When you want to marry assess yourself. Know the thing you will hate most from a wife. If that thing is what the lady takes delight in doing, no matter how beautiful she is separate from her. Thinking she will change is one of the greatest risks in marriage.
19. Don’t think you will manage what your spirit will not accept. This will never make you a good husband you are desiring to be. Marry someone that your spirit accepts. Don’t use sympathy to marry a wife.
20. Don’t start a relationship by giving a woman money to win her love. Unless you will have the money to maintain the love. Loving because of money is no love at all. When the money finishes the love will go. That’s why you shouldn’t use money as a measure for love.
21. If she sees you counting money and she makes a request, don’t give it to her just because she asks. Don’t marry a lady who cannot see money without making a request.
22. If a lady demands so much from you be careful with her. You must not spend your whole money to satisfy a girl. As a male child you will only be getting money from your parents while you are young. When you become a man you would be left to your fate. That is why you shouldn’t waste your resources on women when you are young.
23. If you see a wife you want to marry. Intentionally give her some money to keep for you. If she doesn’t come out with some issues that will make you give her some money from there. Know that you have found a wife that would be able to manage your wealth.
24. If she asks you to give her some amount of money from there. Tell her that the money is to be used to do something that would be beneficial to you in the future. If she is a lady that has good intentions for you, she will not be upset. Because he knows that your future is also her own. Unless she doesn’t mean to settle down with you. Then such a lady does not deserve to be with you.
25. That’s not to say you should not be giving her money from time to time. But never make yourself a bank to a girl. If she loves money so much she should work for it. It’s not a taboo for a woman to own wealth that is gotten from her sweat.
26. While sitting with her to discuss, do not forget to ask her about her family and the kind of lifestyle they live. There are some families whose daughters can never stay with a man because of some curses and covenants they had made. If she is from such a home, the covenant must be broken before she
    could stay with you.
27. If you know you will not support her to break the curse allow her to go. But I wish you should assist in breaking the covenant to open the door for those from her root. These are some of the challenges of life we must face.
28. There are some women you must support in bringing them from their chains before they become your own. She may be one of such women in the world. Breaking of the covenant may have been one of the responsibilities you must do. Remember, there’s nobody without a cross.
29. Before you lavish money for an elaborate wedding, reserve some cash. Never borrow money for a wedding hoping to pay back from the money that would be spreading on you by some friends. If you do, you will have yourself to be blamed. You need to plan your life with what is in your hands and not from what you expect from friends.

30.Don’t allow your intended wife to push you into a standard of wedding you will not be able to afford. If she says she will not wear a rented wedding gown except it is new, don’t succumb to her unless you are rich. If she is not comfortable with a rented gown, she should wear any other clothes that are attractive to the eyes. There’s no law that says a wedding must be done with a gown that is white.

31. Know the family of the lady before you go for an introduction of her marriage. Some families are heartless when it comes to the collection of the bride’s price. When a family is heartless in their demands be careful with them. Know that they are not after your happiness, but after your wealth.

32. In all, when you want to marry pray to God. It is not all that are glitter that are gold. Some women are beautiful in dressing and not in character. Before you fall for the appearance, be conscious of the real.